Part 4: Fun with a Baseball Bat

The First Cut

From FilmmakerIQ.com

Moving along in the film – the prelude to the action… Music is all temporary (used a couple of tracks I already used) – some preliminary color grading…

Simon commented:

The light in the shed looks like it’s flickering and I think toward the end Ryan was looking down the camer

At first I thought that was a camera error… but I think the flickering was we had an overhead light dimmed down so low that it started to flicker. I think it kind of adds to the scene.

Thurman, the poor soul who was sitting in the chair weighed in:

yeah I see it…but correct me if I’m wrong- isn’t it a part of the creepiness? I thought you meant to do that? I saw the wiring in that room, I spent more time looking around with duck-tape on my mouth in that chair with nothing else to do but watch and listen. The fact is: It really is a crappy, poorly kept old garage with 50 year old jerry-rigged wiring and junk everywhere. Flickering lights??? I was surprised we had any light. Very real, very honest.

Rich’s Comments:

John here are my comments on this section
Overall I think it is quite excellent

00;00;09;00 the cut to her sitting down, first reaction to it, that it duplicated too much of the action, hard to determine without putting it on my avid… try trimming a few frames off the heads

00;00;25;00 I would try adding 2 or 3 frames to the tails of the first eye shot, force the eye to screen left, which then forces it back on the next cut, which will build tension. (Sometime soon we should have a discussion on controlling the eye moments in editing, especially montages) and i love the speed ups to the mouth duct taped

00;00;40;00 on her listening to the phone, add the sound of voice mail, etc… just enough to reinforce the non answer….

00;00;44;00 the medium where she puts the phone down, check out trimming the heads of this shot, the movement feels slightly stalled at the beginning, try 2 frames off the heads

00;00;55;00 Not sure what motivates a dissolve there, doesn’t seem warranted to me

00;01;04;00 embellish the sound of the tape rip off,

00;01;12;00 This is a hard cut because it feels like the same exact angle of the previous shot, you might try a slight blow up and a reposition to left or right to help it.

00;01;27;00 i would adjust the cut 2 frames earlier, keep sync just roll the edit (as they say in premiere pro land :P )

00;01;31;23 I was thinking that maybe a pause between the last shot and his reveal in the next would add to the tension, just something to try

00;03;25;00 the cut to the front, eyes looking upwards don’t match the previous shot, I would trim this shot till the eyes and head are down and slightly moving, (one of the 2 cuts in the whole scene that bothered me on the initial viewing)

00;03;59;00 Try delaying the audio of the hit by a couple of frames, if that doesn’t help try leading the hit on the previous shot, and take off heads of this shot, if he fell in the side shot, try match cutting the fall. this was the only other cut that bothered me in the initial viewing.

A very good job John! In the exterior shot of the shed, if there is light seen from the inside, maybe have it flicker a couple of times… just an idea..

At this point, I continued on cutting the rest of the film. This scene remains pretty much untouched (though I applied some of Rich’s suggestions) in the final cut.

 

Next: Editing in the Dark The Attack

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